It's been a few days since I've checked in. After my great day back on track Thursday, I stuffed up Friday night. But Saturday was great, and today is going really well. It's my birthday today! But I'm not interested in bingeing. And what changed my mind was stepping onto the scales on Friday night after a binge! Funny thing to do, but it was the shake up I think I needed. I weighed in at 66.9kgs. This was on Mum's scales, which weigh .6kgs higher than what is accurate (I worked this out long ago!) and also it was at night. So I figured that was ok, I should be about 65kgs by morning - and I was! So I've given myself this week to get back to 64kgs (preferably 63.5kgs so I will weigh in at WW next Friday at 64kgs...).
Yesterday I began a 50 day challenge! Just by myself :) It basically gives me until the end of May to get back to 59kgs. Once and for all fingers crossed! Instead of counting up though, I'm going to count down, e.g. 49 days to go, 48 days to go, 47 days to go... etc etc.
You've probably realised by now that whenever I binge, I have a 'new and improved' plan to try and get me back on track. Quite often, in fact, most often, none work! But I'm pretty determined (heck, I'm even tracking on my birthday!) and definitely believe in falling down 7 times, standing up 8! So this journey may be like a marathon, but I WILL get back to 59kgs.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Back on track!
I'm finally back on track! And feeling great :) Not as great as I'll be feeling when I get to goal, but give me a few weeks!
Yesterday I planned out my entire day as I had friends coming for dinner, in order to stop myself from overeating. I just had weet bix, 0 point veggie soup, a smoothie and a pear, so that I could save about 14 points for the evening. We had homemade hommus and veggie sticks, vegetarian burgers, lemon tart, ice cream and hot chocolate with mini marshmallows. I thoroughly enjoyed it, because I savoured every bite! One friend actually brought over some gourmet cheeses and cabanossi etc, but I didn't have any! I was very proud of myself.
Today is going well too. Had weet bix for brekkie, 10 rice crackers and hommus for morning tea, a salad and turkey meat bun with hommus for lunch and a smoothie. So had 9 points so far, and have 10 left. Not sure what to have for dinner yet.
I made up a table/grid with the next 7 or so weeks on it, and I'm planning to tick off my good days (hopefully all of them!). This is actually working quite well - it's a visual goal and I'm just really determined to get through the next couple of months, lose the weight, get back to 59 and stop thinking and worrying about all this!
Yesterday I planned out my entire day as I had friends coming for dinner, in order to stop myself from overeating. I just had weet bix, 0 point veggie soup, a smoothie and a pear, so that I could save about 14 points for the evening. We had homemade hommus and veggie sticks, vegetarian burgers, lemon tart, ice cream and hot chocolate with mini marshmallows. I thoroughly enjoyed it, because I savoured every bite! One friend actually brought over some gourmet cheeses and cabanossi etc, but I didn't have any! I was very proud of myself.
Today is going well too. Had weet bix for brekkie, 10 rice crackers and hommus for morning tea, a salad and turkey meat bun with hommus for lunch and a smoothie. So had 9 points so far, and have 10 left. Not sure what to have for dinner yet.
I made up a table/grid with the next 7 or so weeks on it, and I'm planning to tick off my good days (hopefully all of them!). This is actually working quite well - it's a visual goal and I'm just really determined to get through the next couple of months, lose the weight, get back to 59 and stop thinking and worrying about all this!
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
No green salad :(
Morning! Well...I was going so well, and then went to a bbq last night armed with my vegetarian kebabs and planning to just have a green salad. I was actually already 12 points over for the day, but had planned to drop my points each day for a couple of days and earn it back (not entirely sure if that works, but I was happy to try it). When I got to the bbq there they didn't have a green salad, just a creamy pasta salad, a caesar salad with creamy dressing and an oily asian salad! And I hadn't saved any points for anything extra! Silly me. So I ate a lot. Including the cake and chocolate that came out after. And today I just feel awful. So bloated and hopeless! So back to day one again today :( If I don't do it now, it's going to get severley out of control!
Today is my 'birthday' (it's not until this Sunday, but I'm celebrating it with some friends tonight) and I'm catering. We're having hommus with rice crackers and veggie sticks, and then vegetarian burgers and then a point friendly lemon tart, ice cream and hot choc. All up my little dinner party is about 13 points, so I'll only be eating 6 points during the day today (which is easy as I made some 0 point veggie soup yesterday and I can have that for lunch). I'm not at all hungry today anyway, after yesterdays efforts!
I hate the hopeless feeling when your goal weight seems just so far away! It's frustrating... I hate being formerly thin. I want to be thin now! But I'm not after a quick fix. I want to do this properly and healthy and hopefully adopt habits that I can continue long after goal. They say it takes about 3 weeks to develop and keep a habit... but only 1 day to break it! Ahh so true. Anyway, I figure that I either do this, and do it properly, or stop worrying and be happy where I am. Well I'm not happy, so I HAVE to do this!!
Today is my 'birthday' (it's not until this Sunday, but I'm celebrating it with some friends tonight) and I'm catering. We're having hommus with rice crackers and veggie sticks, and then vegetarian burgers and then a point friendly lemon tart, ice cream and hot choc. All up my little dinner party is about 13 points, so I'll only be eating 6 points during the day today (which is easy as I made some 0 point veggie soup yesterday and I can have that for lunch). I'm not at all hungry today anyway, after yesterdays efforts!
I hate the hopeless feeling when your goal weight seems just so far away! It's frustrating... I hate being formerly thin. I want to be thin now! But I'm not after a quick fix. I want to do this properly and healthy and hopefully adopt habits that I can continue long after goal. They say it takes about 3 weeks to develop and keep a habit... but only 1 day to break it! Ahh so true. Anyway, I figure that I either do this, and do it properly, or stop worrying and be happy where I am. Well I'm not happy, so I HAVE to do this!!
Monday, April 5, 2010
Haystacks for tea
I'm finally back after a few days away without internet! Had a great weekend - not with food but thats another story! Let's just say I'm restarting my weight loss efforts today! I'm not feeling too bad about the whole thing. It's annoying that I probably have to spend another 2 weeks re-losing the weight I'd already lost (not sure how many - not game to weigh myself!), but I really did enjoy the weekend. I ate lots of healthy food - emphasis on lots - and then enjoyed chocolate and lollies and baked goods. I guess there are always going to be times in life when it's ok to just enjoy yourself, as long as there's an endpoint, and you get back on the wagon.
So day one again today, and so far, SO good. Had weet bix for brekkie, a salad, turkey and cheese sandwich for lunch, a blueberry smoothie, and 8 macadamia nuts (I had to shell them myself, yum!) I plan to have 'haystacks' for tea - refried beans, diced tomatoes combined and heated over 10 rice crackers and salad. Yummo, and only 3 points a serve. And filling too. I also plan to have an orange and poppyseed muffin, and a pear later. I'm not too hungry today, more just tired from the weekend away.
My plan now is to stop thinking and worrying about the weight loss, and let it happen. I know exactly how to do it, and it'll be interesting to see how long (or short) it takes me to lose the weight when I'm 100% consistent. Here's hoping I stick to it!
So day one again today, and so far, SO good. Had weet bix for brekkie, a salad, turkey and cheese sandwich for lunch, a blueberry smoothie, and 8 macadamia nuts (I had to shell them myself, yum!) I plan to have 'haystacks' for tea - refried beans, diced tomatoes combined and heated over 10 rice crackers and salad. Yummo, and only 3 points a serve. And filling too. I also plan to have an orange and poppyseed muffin, and a pear later. I'm not too hungry today, more just tired from the weekend away.
My plan now is to stop thinking and worrying about the weight loss, and let it happen. I know exactly how to do it, and it'll be interesting to see how long (or short) it takes me to lose the weight when I'm 100% consistent. Here's hoping I stick to it!
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Oh and happy easter :)
I'd love to say I've had a great day with food... but that would be a lie. Went well until I felt deprived after dinner, even though salmon quiche is now probably my favourite dish (7 points per serve (serves 4)... with pastry!) and just started eating. I'm so sick of it. I don't even want what I eat, I just think "oh well, another wasted day, may as well do it right."
I've realised too that I'm sick of the same old thing. I'm sick of counting points. I want to just eat when I'm genuinely hungry - healthy, filling food. I'm fine with eating roughly the same thing each day (that's how I originally lost 18kgs), so I'm thinking I'll just stick to a few alternatives (of the same points values), but not have to constantly count points all day.
I like that it's the end of March tonight... I feel like tomorrow can be a new start - if I want this enough. I thought I did... so why aren't I doing anything about it? I read on the WW message boards this morning, a lady had a comment at the bottom a post... "only track on the days you want to lose weight." Wow. Never thought of it that way. It kinda sparked something with me. That it's just one day you have to eat healthy for. And then you do the same thing the next day. While it's necessary to have a long term goal in mind, it can be daunting (when that goal ends up being 2 months down the track). But one day is easy. And then you just repeat that. In a WW mag once I remember reading "success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." So true.
Off to Brissy tomorrow. Will try and avoid supper tomorrow night, so that I can at least have one good day before a potentially bad weekend. Tomorrow will be easy - I'm at uni from 9-11, and then I'm driving home (5 hours) and then another 5 hours to Brissy. I don't eat when I travel, so it won't be a problem. I won't have access to the net until Monday night or perhaps Tuesday morning, so will be back then. And hopefully with a positive report.
Have decided to take 2 friends and my mum out in our canoe for my 22nd birthday, and then have a picnic lunch and girly sleepover. I like the idea of doing something active and fun for my birthday, rather than a huge feast. I'll provide the picnic and then work something out for dinner, so that I can control points (the friends I'm taking should be impressed too, as they are both dieters from way back lol). I don't want to feel sick and sorry for myself on my birthday... yet it will be hard to deprive myself too! Might have to eat 0 point veggies and soup to save as many points as I can for the evening!
Anyway, better start packing. Been slack all afternoon... talk soon! Oh and happy easter :)
I've realised too that I'm sick of the same old thing. I'm sick of counting points. I want to just eat when I'm genuinely hungry - healthy, filling food. I'm fine with eating roughly the same thing each day (that's how I originally lost 18kgs), so I'm thinking I'll just stick to a few alternatives (of the same points values), but not have to constantly count points all day.
I like that it's the end of March tonight... I feel like tomorrow can be a new start - if I want this enough. I thought I did... so why aren't I doing anything about it? I read on the WW message boards this morning, a lady had a comment at the bottom a post... "only track on the days you want to lose weight." Wow. Never thought of it that way. It kinda sparked something with me. That it's just one day you have to eat healthy for. And then you do the same thing the next day. While it's necessary to have a long term goal in mind, it can be daunting (when that goal ends up being 2 months down the track). But one day is easy. And then you just repeat that. In a WW mag once I remember reading "success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." So true.
Off to Brissy tomorrow. Will try and avoid supper tomorrow night, so that I can at least have one good day before a potentially bad weekend. Tomorrow will be easy - I'm at uni from 9-11, and then I'm driving home (5 hours) and then another 5 hours to Brissy. I don't eat when I travel, so it won't be a problem. I won't have access to the net until Monday night or perhaps Tuesday morning, so will be back then. And hopefully with a positive report.
Have decided to take 2 friends and my mum out in our canoe for my 22nd birthday, and then have a picnic lunch and girly sleepover. I like the idea of doing something active and fun for my birthday, rather than a huge feast. I'll provide the picnic and then work something out for dinner, so that I can control points (the friends I'm taking should be impressed too, as they are both dieters from way back lol). I don't want to feel sick and sorry for myself on my birthday... yet it will be hard to deprive myself too! Might have to eat 0 point veggies and soup to save as many points as I can for the evening!
Anyway, better start packing. Been slack all afternoon... talk soon! Oh and happy easter :)
Monday, March 29, 2010
And I was going so well!!
ARGH! After an easy day with food, I got hungry after uni in the afternoon (after I'd eaten a delicious roast beef and salad bun). I had a hot cross bun, and then began dinner. We had kangaroo sausages and curried veggies - both of which I won't be having again any time soon, as I suck at cooking! The sausages tasted tough, yet raw, and the veggies tasted like overcooked zucchini. I was so disappointed, and thus, felt like eating, and here I am now, after raiding the pantry and going over my points by 100. I'm a hopeless case. And I was going so well...
So my new plan, beginning tomorrow is not to count points daily, but weekly. 19 points per day equates to 133 per week. I've found that I have to eat this many per week (no less), but I still haven't mastered listening to my hunger signals. So, I will eat a) only when I'm hungry, and b) only healthy, filling foods. I will track food as I go, but not plan my day out like I have been (though I'll plan dinners to be no more than 8 points, and preferably 6-7). At the end of the day, if I'm well over 19 points, I'll keep a close eye on my points the next few days, to make sure it's not a habit. At the end of the week, if I have any points left over, I'll treat myself (e.g. if I have 3 points left, I'll make a batch of pikelets worth 3 points, or get a WW dessert). I won't go from Friday to Friday though (as I don't want to eat saved points right before weigh in in case there are a lot). So I'll began counting on a Saturday (meaning I eat any saved on Fridays post weigh in). This also means that if I feel hungrier on the weekend, I can tighten my belt through the week. All saved points will disappear Sat morn, 12am, and the 133 will begin again. Hopefully this week work!!
I'm a little depressed over my binge, so I'll leave it there tonight. Back tomorrow! Hopefully after a better day...
So my new plan, beginning tomorrow is not to count points daily, but weekly. 19 points per day equates to 133 per week. I've found that I have to eat this many per week (no less), but I still haven't mastered listening to my hunger signals. So, I will eat a) only when I'm hungry, and b) only healthy, filling foods. I will track food as I go, but not plan my day out like I have been (though I'll plan dinners to be no more than 8 points, and preferably 6-7). At the end of the day, if I'm well over 19 points, I'll keep a close eye on my points the next few days, to make sure it's not a habit. At the end of the week, if I have any points left over, I'll treat myself (e.g. if I have 3 points left, I'll make a batch of pikelets worth 3 points, or get a WW dessert). I won't go from Friday to Friday though (as I don't want to eat saved points right before weigh in in case there are a lot). So I'll began counting on a Saturday (meaning I eat any saved on Fridays post weigh in). This also means that if I feel hungrier on the weekend, I can tighten my belt through the week. All saved points will disappear Sat morn, 12am, and the 133 will begin again. Hopefully this week work!!
I'm a little depressed over my binge, so I'll leave it there tonight. Back tomorrow! Hopefully after a better day...
Saturday, March 27, 2010
I have never felt this tired!
Ok, prepare for the melodrama: I have never felt this tired!
I couldn't sleep last night. Managed a few hours and woke up again at 4am. I spent an hour and a half trying to fall asleep, trying everything I could think of. I think the problem was that I was thinking too much and too hard. Anyway, at 5:30am, I couldn't take it any longer and got up.
It was quite calm and relaxing being up so early; I felt like I was the only one up in the world.
Had a cup of tea and a hot cross bun, and was still hungry, so had delicious french toast with maple syrup. But... it was SO good that I kinda scoffed it, and then proceeded to eat an apple and a snack bag of rick snacks. It was 8:30am and I was sitting at 8 points eaten, and 11 to go. Usually when I eat that much by that early in the morning, the rest of the day is a blow out!
But I wasn't going to let that happen. We went to Church at 10am, and arrived home just before 12pm, so by then it was lunch time, yay! Had a WW frozen meal, because I got 3 vouchers for half-price meals (in the current mag and at my meeting). It was beef cannelloni, and at 5.5 points it wasn't cheap on points. It wasn't that great either :( which is a pity because it looked so nice on the box! (I also bought sweet and sour chicken and cottage pie - cottage pie is a favourite, hopefully s&s chicken will be good too.)
After lunch I was full, and feeling really tired so I went and layed down and slept for 3 hours! I had my fan on, but I woke up feeling hot and groggy, and while I feel cooler now, the grogginess is still there :( I hate that feeling.
Had 2 big glasses of water (already drank 9 glasses today - it's so hot!) and a hot cross bun, and will prepare dinner after 5pm, and then I still have enough points for a blueberry smoothie. Yay! I knew I didn't have to overeat, especially after how good I was making up those points yesterday! Thanks solely to my nana nap this afternoon!
Tonight's dinner is a chickpea patty and salsa and salad. I love chickpea pattys, and they're only 2.5 points, bonus!
I feel a hectic week coming on. I have an assignment I haven't started (genuine technical difficulties) that is due Tuesday, so that'll be Monday night's agenda, and Tuesday is a long day at uni (3 hours morning, 4 hours afternoon), plus Bible study. Wednesday settles down, but on Thursday I head home at 11am, and as soon as I get home, I have to jump in the car for more travelling to Brissy for Easter! Long day.
I can't wait to stop feeling so groggy and yuk. But at least I can feel good about continuing to eat within my points today!
I couldn't sleep last night. Managed a few hours and woke up again at 4am. I spent an hour and a half trying to fall asleep, trying everything I could think of. I think the problem was that I was thinking too much and too hard. Anyway, at 5:30am, I couldn't take it any longer and got up.
It was quite calm and relaxing being up so early; I felt like I was the only one up in the world.
Had a cup of tea and a hot cross bun, and was still hungry, so had delicious french toast with maple syrup. But... it was SO good that I kinda scoffed it, and then proceeded to eat an apple and a snack bag of rick snacks. It was 8:30am and I was sitting at 8 points eaten, and 11 to go. Usually when I eat that much by that early in the morning, the rest of the day is a blow out!
But I wasn't going to let that happen. We went to Church at 10am, and arrived home just before 12pm, so by then it was lunch time, yay! Had a WW frozen meal, because I got 3 vouchers for half-price meals (in the current mag and at my meeting). It was beef cannelloni, and at 5.5 points it wasn't cheap on points. It wasn't that great either :( which is a pity because it looked so nice on the box! (I also bought sweet and sour chicken and cottage pie - cottage pie is a favourite, hopefully s&s chicken will be good too.)
After lunch I was full, and feeling really tired so I went and layed down and slept for 3 hours! I had my fan on, but I woke up feeling hot and groggy, and while I feel cooler now, the grogginess is still there :( I hate that feeling.
Had 2 big glasses of water (already drank 9 glasses today - it's so hot!) and a hot cross bun, and will prepare dinner after 5pm, and then I still have enough points for a blueberry smoothie. Yay! I knew I didn't have to overeat, especially after how good I was making up those points yesterday! Thanks solely to my nana nap this afternoon!
Tonight's dinner is a chickpea patty and salsa and salad. I love chickpea pattys, and they're only 2.5 points, bonus!
I feel a hectic week coming on. I have an assignment I haven't started (genuine technical difficulties) that is due Tuesday, so that'll be Monday night's agenda, and Tuesday is a long day at uni (3 hours morning, 4 hours afternoon), plus Bible study. Wednesday settles down, but on Thursday I head home at 11am, and as soon as I get home, I have to jump in the car for more travelling to Brissy for Easter! Long day.
I can't wait to stop feeling so groggy and yuk. But at least I can feel good about continuing to eat within my points today!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)